Learning New Meanings of “Grace”
November 3, 2018
Learning New Meanings of “Grace”
Grace is a concept that has always intrigued me, but one that I find difficult to wrap my head around. Growing up under the umbrella of Catholicism, the message I heard over and over was the “the importance of living in the state of grace.” This phrase was always linked with the idea that “being in the state of grace” was your ticket to enter heaven. No one ever clearly defined what that statement meant, but through inference I surmised that that it meant having no unforgiven sins on your ledger. As children we were taught that once you went to confession and acknowledged your sins, your sins were forgiven provided you said the prayers that the priest assigned you at the end of your confession. Once you completed the confessional process, then you were restored to the state of grace. For years I associated the concept of “grace” as being free from any unforgiven sins. We were also taught in our early years that if you died with sins for which you hadn’t received forgiveness, then you wouldn’t be in a state of grace and therefore, you wouldn’t be allowed into heaven. Depending on the seriousness of your unforgiven sins, you might spend eternity in either Purgatory or Hell.
A bit of a side story here for readers not familiar with how children were introduced to Catholic practices in years past, I have a humorous story to share. Children typically were prepared to make their First Communion while they were in second grade. But before you could receive Communion, you had to make your First Confession so that you were in a state of grace to receive the Body and Blood of Christ.
If you the reader are not a Catholic yourself, or if you grew up in more recent years within the Catholic Church, you may not recognize the experiences I’m describing, but if you mention these practices to friends or family members who were raised in the Catholic traditions before some of the previous practices were modernized, I’m pretty sure that they will back up my rendition.
The text we used to learn about Catholicism and what was expected of us was known as The Baltimore Catechism. Much of the Catechism focused on the expectations and/or sins associated with the Ten Commandments. If you google “The Baltimore Catechism,” you’ll find a description that reads like the following:
“A Catechism of Christian Doctrine, Prepared and Enjoined by Order of the Third Council of
Baltimore, or simply The Baltimore Catechism, was the official national catechism for Children in the United States of America, based on Robert Bellarmine’s 1614 Small Catechism” Source: Wikipedia
The Catechism was organized in a question/answer format that was used to convey the doctrine of the times. For example, in response to the question: Why did God make me? – The answer: God made me to know and love Him would follow. You get the idea.
The Catechism discussed the sins associated with each of the Ten Commandments. Typically, religious instruction involved memorizing assigned sections of the Catechism. As part of preparing to make our First Confession, we were required to practice what we would say when it was our turn to enter the Confessional. When your turn came, you had to walk to the front of the class, kneel on the pre-dieu, and then recite your sins. We each memorized how one begins one’s confession which goes like this: Bless me father for I have sinned since my last confession. Once you recited this opening statement, then you listed your sins and how many times you committed them.
As I was waiting for my turn and listening to other children’s confessions I remember hearing things like: I have committed adultery three times. REALLY: Think about it; we were in second grade!
While I look back on some of the religious practices associated with the Catholic Church, on balance I am also well aware of the benefits I received from the same education. Mostly, I am grateful for the instruction that helped me develop a conscience and that laid the groundwork of the difference between right and wrong.
I was able to appreciate my early Catholic education even more when I read Robert Rohr’s book titled, Falling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life. He clearly delineates how the religion of one’s origin in the early years of life lays the groundwork to help children build a moral compass. Rohr describes the process that typically begins as one reaches the second half of life in which one begins to seek deeper spiritual practices that are less dependent on rules and prescribed lists of behaviors in favor of guidance that supports one in pursuing the deeper meanings of life and living a life of greater awareness and compassion.
Rohr’s description of the process of pursuing a deeper spiritual awakening is an accurate description of my own path. Through extensive reading, developing a yoga and meditation practice, I am in awe of the insights that can surface through these types of endeavors.
The nature of insights that can be gained varies; one of the insights that I value the most is becoming more aware of how my ego is often the voice informing my actions and reactions. At other times, the insights I gain involve having a deeper understanding of the concepts that I may have been introduced to in my Baltimore Catechism days.
One such concept is the meaning of grace. As noted earlier, the meaning of grace that anchors my understanding of it is being free from sin. That meaning has more to do with what one shouldn’t do. As I’ve pursued or been open to gaining deeper insights, my evolving understanding of grace is a more active understanding: It has to do with what one can do! Several quotes shed some light on the potential riches associated with the word grace.
I do not understand the mystery of grace, only that if finds me when I need it and leaves me someplace different from where it found me.” Anne Lamott
Grace fills empty spaces, but it can only enter when there is a void to receive it is grace itself which makes the void. Simone Well
I’ve also heard Oprah say more than once that when she asks people what they want most from their lives she often hears, “I want to live a life of grace.”
So what does a life of grace look like? My sense is that it is a life infused with constant kindness that leads to comporting oneself in such a manner that conveys respect and compassion for others. A couple of days ago I was scheduled to facilitate a meeting that I thought could have some confrontational moments. My morning meditation included listening to a recording that focused on grace. As I was meditating after listening to the recording, an insight popped into my head that offered me an understanding of how I could exercise more grace in my role as a facilitator. I’m faced with delivering outcomes that are part of the reason why an institution hires me to oversee a project. In my role, I feel a necessity to assist participants in understanding why changes are required in their roles and in the products and processes that they oversee. I also feel a need to keep folks on task and moving forward with the project. I gained some insights into how I could insert more grace in my feedback and guidance.
Specifically, even though I’ve addressed some of the same issues and offered similar explanations in the past, I can exercise more patience in understanding why people resist change or fear it. I can focus on entertaining more dialogue in helping people understand why certain past practices and approaches require change. I can’t force people to change but I can share what information is helping me understand why change is necessary.
I have enough experience in higher education leadership roles to know that there is a common phenomenon which often leads to tension between faculty/staff and higher ed administrators. They live in different worlds regarding what information is considered as important in guiding decision-making. My experience suggests that it is easier to stick with what we know and designate as most valuable to us versus exploring new l information that may lead to change. So a void exists…a space where both sides can gain a workable understanding of the issues and values that can be embraced by both sides. This void is an invitation and incentive for me to concentrate on how working from grace in my role as a facilitator might yield more productive and embracing participation by all involved.
I like being more aware that “Living a life of grace” may be more possible by my being more mindful of ways in which I may be an instrument of grace.
