Recently I took part in an activity that included assessing the balance among the major components of my life. The broad categories of life included: Work (paid or volunteer), Health (physical, emotional, spiritual, etc.), Relationships, and Play. More about this work in a later blog.

I decided after completing the exercise that I was a little lean on Play. Play in the context of the exercise was defined as any activity which leads to joy and is energizing and engaging. So I set about to make more time for play in my life. No surprise, but the intention itself increased my awareness to such opportunities as they presented themselves. I’ve been a member of the Museum of Fine Arts (MFA) in Boston for many years, but I’ve never enrolled in any of the courses that they offer. What a treat when I opened my email one morning to see an announcement that the Museum was offering a 6 session course on women artists who have gone unnoticed in art history. The course was titled, She Prevailed, and with an appropriate sense of humor, the women lecturers dubbed the course, She Persisted, which drew an appropriate amount of laughter from the audience.

I signed up immediately and cleared my schedule to be able to attend. In case you’re wondering why I deemed this activity a form of play, I can give you multiple reasons. First, it gives me a reason and a destination for heading into Boston, a City I truly enjoy. I worked in the City for almost 10 years and any time I am in the City, I find it energizing and I never tire of exploring it. When the feminist movement took hold in the 1980’s, it opened up new worlds for me about women’s accomplishments. I’ve always enjoyed learning, and it is pretty amazing that I didn’t even notice women’s absence in the curriculum until I had completed my Ph.D. I was a double major in mathematics as an undergraduate, and in completing some 60 credits in mathematics I never had one female teacher. So the chance to learn more about how women have contributed to our lives touches me deeply in my life. Such experiences resonate with me in ways that ground my life experiences and echo what I value in my inner being. These kind of insights touch on multiple dimensions of my life, but they definitely bring me joy – making it possible for me to associate such activities with Play.

Something else I learned from mentally categorizing this lecture series as Play is that it made me more aware of what I was getting from the experience as I was doing it. How does labelling something bring it more clearly into focus? Two things come to mind. First, not all elements of a Play activity have to be free from aggravation, but reminding myself that some parts of an activity may be more fun that others helps to take the edge off of less desirable aspects of the venture.

Being in the City for me invites new opportunities and pathways for me to get my steps in for the day (A Fitbit Fan Am I!). Walking a mile from the train station to the Museum on a beautiful Spring day in ideal weather conditions (50s, sunny, and no wind) is a joy in and of itself…so much so that I don’t even think of the walking as exercise. The same steps on a raw, windy, rainy day are experienced differently, but if I remind myself that these same steps are leading me to something I enjoy, I can more easily let go of focusing on the discomfort.
I experience similar facets of play while I’m gardening. When I am creating container arrangements, picking combinations of bloom and color I lose myself in the beauty of the experience. I wouldn’t say I go into a trance, but I do lose all track of time as I become totally engaged in the process of creating beauty. However, on the other hand, digging 12” holes in rocky soil is not my idea of fun or play, but again, it’s a necessary step in creating a beautiful garden that will give me pleasure for almost six months a year. Overall, a very fair exchange!
Another benefit of taking note of a Play mindset is that it taps into a different lens that opens the door to adding on to the initial activity. For example, once I was in the City for the Museum experience, I decided to stay in town for lunch. I enjoy eating out, and while part of enjoying dining out is the opportunity to spend time connecting with others without the distractions that can occur when dining at home, I have also acquired a level of comfort in dining alone. More on this in a later blog. Restaurants in the City are always changing, so in addition to visiting my favorites, I enjoy exploring new spots – once in awhile the experience is a bust, but if I do a little homework ahead of time, the experience usually turns out well.
Playing always seems to energize me. I’m not sure I can accurately pinpoint the exact source of the energy, but in general, I think “exploring” leads to learning/experiencing new things and this continuing discovery is part of how we evolve. Experiences help us discover or re-discover things about ourselves. Think of how you feel when you “re-do” a room in your home; maybe you just repaint or hang new wallpaper, hang new curtains, or purchase a new painting or piece of furniture. The change doesn’t have to be drastic; even simple changes enable us to experience a familiar setting differently. Our tastes change with time and as we develop more parts of ourselves, and it is fun to witness our own growth and evolvement.
Paying attention to including Play in my life has held some surprises for me. By thinking about Play and talking about the experience with close friends, they pointed out multiple things in my life that they see as forms of Play for me. Enjoying my lap time with my cats, for example, does bring joy into my life. Cooking a new recipe most weeks is something I do because I enjoy it, so I’m good with thinking of it as a form of Play – at least that is how my friends view it.

One final note – Play experiences may cost money. I’ve had to practice – although I’m getting quite good at it as I get older – on spending money on Play activities, especially when these experiences are more expensive than I am used to. Some of my initial reluctance stems from growing up in a family where there was very little discretionary income. I owe it to good friends who have helped show me how to spend money on myself. And as we age, I’ve read multiple articles describing an inclination to spend less on purchasing “things” and instead using one’s resources to open up “new experiences” – advice that I am finding works for me!!!